You’ve followed guides and comments, and updated your photos hoping that would make a change. But in the end, all that effort hasn’t seemed to do much. Maybe you even got more likes when you were using just selfies.
When trying to research how to do it better, you can see why some people are not getting matches.
But when it comes to your profile, you can’t put your finger on why you’re not getting the success you want.
“Good enough” depends on your goals
In general, better your profile, the more matches you can get. So where you draw the line of good enough depends on what kind of matches you want.
From my experience in my area, majority of girls on dating apps are after a long term relationship and only minority are after casual hookups. And in comparison, more men seem to be after casual hookups over long term relationships. In other words, the more casual you want, the smaller the pool of potential girls for you to match with.
So, these experiences suggest that you need to put in way more effort if you’re looking for casual relationships. Similarly you need to put in more effort if you restrict the pool in some other way such as wanting particularly high quality girls for a long term relationship or girls interested in particular kink. Doubly so if you combine these requirements e.g. kinky good looking girls looking for casual sex!
However, I would suggest as good of a profile for guys looking to settle down as I suggest to people looking for casual relationships.
Why?
With a great profile, more girls are likely to be interested in them. This provides a guy with more options thus they can choose who they would like to date seriously. So instead of clinging on the first girl that shows them affection, they can see who they click and vibe the best with.
How much and where should I Put my effort into with a Tinder profile?
First, you should consider what are your standards, preferences and wants. Reflect and write down:
- What kind of girls you want? Any cute girl, close to a 10/10 girl who’s basically a model, a girl from specific subculture, a girl with certain kink? Or possibly a mixture of those?
- What kind of relationship you want?
Your standards and wants will likely change over time the more you meet girls and learn what you like and don’t like, so these don’t need to be exact. They are meant to act as a direction rather than a prescriptive plan.
Next, take a deep look at yourself and consider what would you need to improve in order to reach the level of girls in the relationship style you want.
- How much would you need to change your physique? How close do you need to be to a lean V-shaped body or is slight dad bod OK?
- Would you need to dress in certain way to convey certain vibe that attracts girls you’re into or fits the subculture the girls belong to? Should you convey more player vibes with your outfit or should it more towards cuddly boyfriend style? Should you showcase your physique with your outfits?
- What kind of photos would you need to showcase what you want? Should you showcase being a party animal, a hippy boy, a Dom, a successful businessman, or something else to convey who you are and attract who’d enjoy your company authentically?
Answers to what you need to improve depend on previous answers. So if your standards are high, looking for more casual flings or your combination of preferences limits the pool of girls drastically, you often need to improve yourself further in terms of physique, style and photos in comparison.
These questions should help you build yourself awareness of the roadmap to attract girls to your liking. Some of those can be done over some days or weeks like style and photos, but physique often takes years to improve. So focus building habits that help you improve steadily towards these goals over time, instead of creating a surge of motivation that fades within couple weeks. You can take a inspiration from how I decided on my goals and how those guided my efforts.
Tired of being single and invisible to women?
Get my free 60+ page guide sent to your inbox with which you will:
- Learn how to become an attractive guy that girls turn to check out
- Pick interesting photo ideas from your life to show your authentic personality
- Avoid the most common Tinder photo mistakes when taking photos
I’ll also make sure you get exclusive future actionable tips on Tinder and dating you can read in 5 minutes, for free.
